The Memory Palace

31 Jul

The Memory PalaceThe Memory Palace by Mira Bartok

My rating: 4 of 5 stars

First of all, I want to say thank you to Mira Bartok, for writing this. This is really a sensitive topic, even I, who had been on mental hospital for two weeks being an intern, still finding mental health is quite bizarre. Hell, even I, who drank all those pills for MDD still can’t grasp the whole idea of mental illnesses.

I remember many things while I was reading this memoir. This book is about how Mira and her sister’s turbulence relationship with their mother. Their mother was a homeless woman who’s clearly had a textbook paranoid schizophrenic. The center part of this book is her. There are description of her, how she started having hallucinations, how she actually cope, how she’s having the attack. You can see that it is quite real, the symptoms, all she reacts to things, even there are letters from her to Mira in this books (which makes me cry while falling in love by her beautiful loving character).

When I was being an intern in a mental hospital, I had to watch all these poor people trembling in the middle of the night afraid of unseen things. I had to watch a young person in his 30ish, who became a friend of mine that time, wanted to kill himself all of a sudden in front of me and my best friend eyes. And the things I always remember is the memory of seeing the cured stable ones, who’s already discharged by hospital, but their family never showed up to take them, so they have to live in that hospital, selling newspaper. Once, one of them, a man, showed me his letter to his family who’s never came to take him home. I went home crying out loud to my mum afterward. I remembered I told her I was afraid of them, I was afraid I would become one of them and my mum didn’t want to take me home. That memory came back to life when reading this.

Aside from her mother, Mira wrote about her struggle of Traumatic Brain Injury after accident that happened to her. She had an issue of her memory. I am related to this. I didn’t have Traumatic Brain Injury, but I got diagnosed for MDD and after that I had a “disturbance” to my memory (well, I won’t tell you the details, it’s not interesting though). I kind of understand the way she feels, how she frustrated by it. Another thing that I easily felt like home when devouring this memoir is about Mira’s ex husband who I think had a Mood Disorder as well.

The lists are too long, I love many aspects about the book. The writing is good, and how Mira combined it with illustration is beautiful. Probably, just one thing that bothers me. It’s the part when Mira went to Italy or to Palestine, I thought it’s a little unnecessary and anticlimax when I really wanted to know about her mother.

But really, this book opens people’s eyes about schizophrenia, including me. I know, in here, Indonesia, there are raising people’s awareness of mental health. But I think they are focusing on depression or bipolar, when it’s not all the problem. There are so many mental illnesses. For example, there are schizophrenic, people who you called crazy when you’re sympathize with depression. There are homeless people who struggled. They are human being, they do have hearts, they still remembers their children, their family. For God’s sake, they too want to go home.

Again, thank you Mira, for writing this beautiful memoir. I hope that I won’t forget it, I won’t forget Norma, I won’t forget my memory of my patients trembling and scared (and scared me too in the process), my patient in the psychiatric intensive unit who wanted to kill himself (made me want to scream but I couldn’t), and my patient who’s really looking better and couldn’t go home. After I read this book I miss my mum immensely. Thank you.

View all my reviews on Goodreads on the link.

This is my third book (I’m soooo way behind) in my TBR pile challenged by Adam.

Iklan

Mini ARC Review : Beyond the Green

7 Feb

Title : Beyond the Green

Author : Sharlee Glenn

Pub Date 02 Oct 2018 

Publisher : Charlesbridge

Got this ARC from Netgalley in exchange for honest review.  This book tells a story about family in a prairie who raised a child of the Ute tribe named Dorinda for four whole years. All of a sudden, the girl’s birth mother wants her child back to her.

This book surprised me, in a good way. Of course, when I started this book, I’m kind of expecting the Little House on the Praire vibe, all the pleasant things about making cheese et cetera. But nope, this book is not like that. It’s not really about the life on the prairie. Eventhough there is a slight vibe to it (and I love that slight vibe), but the book is centered on the main issue. The book is about family, about letting go and doing what is right. The book is about love and I love it for that. It is surprising that this book could make me care so much to the characters. Not even the protagonist, but the so called antagonist. The author made me think about how in life there are many perspectives. And my favorite part is when the girls are running away to save Dorinda. It’s quite an adventure and pleasantly thrilling. And I enjoy it when they all go to Ute tribe festival, got to know a bit about Ute Tribe is a point plus for me.

Glad I found this book. This book is not a tearjerker for me, but it’s really touching. I really enjoyed this book. Thank you, Sharlee Glenn. Thank you.

Book Review : The Handmaid’s Tale

28 Jan

The Handmaid's TaleThe Handmaid’s Tale by Margaret Atwood

My rating: 4 of 5 stars

(Please click the link for review in Bahasa Indonesia)

Here is Gilead. One crazy place, where the society divided in social classes. Men, divided to classes that a little above women. There are important people called Commanders, there are soldiers like Angel and Guardian, or even spies, The Eye. It’s kind of cool to think about, their name. How about women ? Women also have their own classes. From the lowest Unwomen to the highest Wife of Commander. Just like the red cover which represent Handmaid’s color , this book tells about the Handmaid called Offred (it is not her actual name). Women who became Handmaid have their own job, and that job is to get pregnant and give birth to Commander’s child. Pretty much that’s what they have to do.

I was a little surprised when I read Atwood, this is my first experience of her work. I knew she’s a contemporary writer, and just like other writer in the genre (such as Jennifer Egan, Ian McEwan, and Chuck Palahniuk)  I already knew I’m going to have difficulties to digest her work. But the surprising fact is, even though I prepared for it, I was still surprised. Oh my god, I wish Atwood a little bit care about punctuation. I had a hard times to understand her words and had to repeat same sentences over and over again. The problem is not in language she used though, it’s in the punctuation, especially the quotation mark. Only at the ending, I came to realize that the story was supposed to be a retelling from our main character. I really think it wouldn’t hurt to use some quotation marks, so reader like me can understand who talks to who.

But no need to worry, I found myself forgiving these quotation marks things. Because, the stories are superb! Even though it has a slow pace at the beginning, but I got to admit that the premise is really interesting and made me survived till the end of the book. In my opinion, this book brings a lot of issues. But one issue that caught my mind a lot is the issue about human nature. Like, in Atwood’s Gilead, these crazy regulations are made to achieve one big goals for people of the Gilead. But I can see, as the story goes, there are a lot of people fight back, rebelled,  hide things, or stole things. It’s all because our human nature, no matter how strict the rules are there are always this needs.

Actually I really wanted to give this book five stars because of its story. But I just couldn’t do that because I’m not that fond of our main character, Offred, she seems like a little bit selfish though. I’m also disappointed of the ending that felt so much like anticlimax. Hence, I gave it four stars and I’m really glad I picked this book from my TBR after so long. For the record guys, no need to worry if you don’t watch the series, me neither and I really like the book! Surely, I’ll read Atwood’s works again sometimes.

View all my reviews

Review Buku : All the Light We Cannot See

17 Jan

All the Light We Cannot SeeAll the Light We Cannot See by Anthony Doerr
My rating: 2 of 5 stars

Sendu, itu yang saya pikirkan ketika melihat sampul buku ini. Tentu saja ini sendu, pikir saya, dari beberapa buku yang saya baca mengenai perang dunia, nyaris semuanya sendu. Buku ini bercerita mengenai dua orang yang berbeda kewarganegaraan pada saat perang. Yang satu, seorang gadis buta dari Prancis dan yang satunya lagi seorang anak yatim piatu dari Jerman. Mereka tidak memiliki tautan sama sekali sebelumnya, tetapi perang mengubah segalanya.

Saya memang suka dengan cerita- cerita tentang perang dunia kedua yang diprakarsai Hitler. Sebut saja deh, Number the Stars, Atonement, Unbroken, The Book Thief dan beberapa buku lagi, semuanya saya nikmati. Bahkan sampai buku yang kurang populer seperti 22 Brittania Road bisa membuat saya mewek dan akhirnya tidak bisa tidur.

Sampai saat ini…

Tidak, saya tidak mengatakan buku ini jelek. Sama sekali tidak. Hanya saja ada perbedaan yang sangat besar pada diri saya sekarang yang sedikit mempengaruhi kemampuan dan selera membaca saya. Tidak perlulah saya menceritakan apa, tapi yang jelas buku ini membuat saya kesulitan sekali untuk mencerna kata demi kata. Oh tentu saja saya menyalahkan diri saya sendiri dulu sebelum saya mulai menyalahkan buku ini.

Nah sekarang waktunya membahas dari segi bukunya. Dengan dua sudut pandang karakter yang berasal dari dua kubu berbeda saat perang berkecamuk, cerita di buku ini memiliki premis yang menarik. Bagaimana ceritanya dua orang tersebut diceritakan dalam satu buku? Apa hubungannya? Itulah yang menjadi pertanyaan dari saya saat memulai membaca buku ini dengan antusias. Saya sama sekali tidak mempermasalahkan dua sudut pandang ini, saya menyukainya. Karakternya juga baik sekali diceritakan dari awal sebelum hidup berkecamuk oleh perang sampai pada saat perang. Malahan buku ini lebih layak disebut sebagai bildungsroman. Saya menikmati bagaimana Marie Laurie, si gadis Prancis, mendeskripsikan segalanya melalui inderanya kecuali mata. Saya juga menikmati bagaimana Marie Laurie suka dengan buku – buku klasik anak yang dihadiahkan kepadanya. Saya juga suka dengan cerita Werner yang gemar sekali dengan radio.

Kemudian muncul lah satu bongkah batu misterius yang entah benar atau tidak bisa membuat tuannya hidup kekal. Sebenarnya saat batu ini disebut di awal, saya mulai penasaran. Tidak pernah saya membaca sejarah perang dunia dicampurkan dengan hal yang berbau sihir. Sayangnya, rasa penasaran saya cukup sampai disitu. Saya pikir akan ada adegan fantasi atau penuh keajaiban yang terjadi, tapi tiiiidaaaak. Saya bahkan tidak mengerti batu itu diceritakan untuk apa. Kalau boleh jujur -tentu saja saya boleh jujur, kan?- Saya bahkan tidak tahu buku ini tentang apa selain untuk menyampaikan kehidupan sebelum perang dua orang yang berbeda.

Satu lagi, hal yang saya cari – cari tidak saya temukan sampai akhir di buku ini. Apa itu? Saya kehilangan sesuatu yang namanya…air mata … atau rasa simpati … atau rasa sedih atau rasa peduli terhadap satu tokoh pun. Tidak. Ada. Sama. Sekali. Buku ini terasa hampa dan sepertinya tidak memiliki emosi. Zero. Ini yang membuat saya kecewa berat. Padahal penulisannya sangat baik dan yah… bisa dibilang indah. Yah, tipe -tipe penulisan buku yang mendapat penghargaan lah. Yep, buku ini memang mendapat penghargaan. Pullitzer,pemirsa, Pullitzer!

Saya ingin sekali menyukai buku ini, tetapi saya tidak bisa. Bayangkan saya tidak menyukai buku pemenang Pullitzer! Di tengah- tengah banyaknya review bagus yang bergelimang bintang, saya memberikan buku ini 2 bintang.

View all my reviews

Book Review : Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can’t Stop Talking

16 Jan

Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can't Stop TalkingQuiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can’t Stop Talking by Susan Cain

My rating: 3 of 5 stars

Wow! This is a non fiction and I’m really happy to find out that I AM able to enjoy non fiction book. This is my first non fiction book of the year, maybe my first since years ago I read Unbroken. I’m so excited to read this one because it’s on my TBR reading challenge list this year hosted by Roof Beam Reader. It’s a fun and helpful challenge for anyone like me who has TBR piled up so high.

Quiet has 300ish pages and divided to four parts. This book is everything about introverts and their (or should I say our?) struggle to the world. I mean it is a struggle for introverts to blend in the society that has this standard. For example, it’s great to be bold, it’s great to be outgoing, love parties, being funny and loves to tell joke. I quote this book,” we became a nation of extroverts”.

“We know from myths and fairy tales that there are many different kinds of powers in this world. One child is given a light saber,another a wizard’s education.”

I don’t know how to explain this, but reading this book surprised me a lot. First, I got surprised by how introvert I am. Of course I knew I’m introverts back before I read it, it’s why I decided to put this book on my TBR list just after I met Cain on TED talks (nope, nope, not literally met tho, but I did streaming TED talks and there she is talking about this book). But I still got surprised that I am REALLY that introvert and found it a little bit sad. I mean, first chapters of the book explain to us how the ideal human being in society IS an extrovert. And I felt kind of sad, because all of sudden I remember of my struggle in school, in friendship, and in work. I thought I am the weird one, I am the anomaly, but no, this book tells me that maybe I am not extrovert and it’s totally normal.

“Yes, we are only pretending to be extroverts, and yes, such inauthenticity can be morally ambiguous ( not to mention exhausting), but if it’s in the service of love or a professional calling, then we’re doing just as Shakespeare advise”

Second, I got surprised by how this book explained about many scientific studies but still can be enjoyed. I enjoy this book! Well I’m not going to lie, due to my limited ability to concentrate for a long time, there still are times when I should repeat what the writer said over and over. But overall I enjoy how Susan Cain explains things. I like how she gave us examples. But I just couldn’t quite grasp the whole business and the Wall Street things that stated in this book and unfortunately, it’s mentioned much in this book. I guess because the background of Susan Cain, she told many stories about business. Anyway, I love the other parts of book, especially on “How to Cultivate Quiet Kids in a World That Can’t Hear Them”.

Quiet is not only about introverts and not only FOR introverts. This book tells so much about extroverts too. So I think it’s good for extroverts who want to understand about their introverts friends, children, colleagues, or spouses. The book gave us a solution for our struggle too, it taught us to embrace our differences. I gave this book 3.5 stars actually, but GR doesn’t have that half star so yeah…

View all my reviews

Book Review : The Good Father

14 Jan

The Good FatherThe Good Father by Diane Chamberlain
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

Among many books she wrote, only three which I have read but Diane Chamberlain never fails to make me excited to finish her books.This is my third book by her, and I won’t hesitate to tell you guys, that I enjoyed this one. I might be worried a bit when I started this book, because I’ve seen so many mix reviews about it. Some people love it, but there are other voices that said this is her worst book.

The Good Father consists of three stories of characters. But they are connected by this child named Bella. Bella is Travis and Robin’s child who got separated because of terrible situations between their past. Story began with Travis who tried his attempt to get help from Erin for babysitting Bella for a night. Erin, who is thirty something woman and still in grief after the death of her child, didn’t know that Travis will leave her with his child (who is really adorable, by the way) to babysit while he worked his ass off to pay bill and involved in drug dealer case.

It’s not thrilling story, I mean from the very first start, I just knew that Travis will make series of problems that lead to guns and crimes. It’s not a mistery puzzles too. I didn’t mind, because the three characters and any other minor characters are complex and easy to sympathize with. I really felt how Travis who still wants to be the good father for Bella eventhough he is really struggle with money he has. I did understand about the grief and depression Erin felt. And I couldn’t hate Robin who wants a better life from before when she got through surgeries. I even sympathized with Robin’s father who lied and lied for the safety of his daughter. This story is character driven story, where readers really fell for the characters and try to understand them. Not that the plot is boring but the best thing in this book comes from its characters.

The story is mainly about being a good parents , being a good partner, being a good family for those around us. The Erin’s story told us about grief and how everyone has their own coping mechanism to get through of it. This was interesting to me because many parts in this book felt like a psychological books but with interesting plot. That is why I love Diane Chamberlain works, because I like the touch of psychology in her books.

Anyway, this is not thriller books but you will find suspense built until the end of the book. The writing is not poetic, of course, but really flow nicely and it makes the book enjoyable. I loved how this books have three point of views, loved the plot, loved the ending. Only one that I disliked a little bit is the opening of the book. Starting the book from Travis left Bella with Erin so that he can do some crimes is making the first chapters of the book feels like a downslope of tension and pace. But other than that, this is a great book about family and love.

View all my reviews

2018 New Release Challenge Sign Up

14 Jan

2018 New Release Challenge logo

Hello Guys, I have read five books this year and hopefully it’s still counting! There were ups and downs last year, and I only have read 24 books. Although that means I still have some literary appetite, it makes me kind of down when seeing others’ numbers.

So what else can I do to boost up my reading activity except to join challenges? I love reading challenges! If not because challenges, I wouldn’t be joining reader community in my country. I wouldn’t be a reader. I still remember how challenges made me so thrilled and excited to read books and review it. Oh yes, it wasn’t easy because not all books are my cup of tea, but I think I enjoyed the effort.

I decided that I would be joining challenges for this year. Not only because I love challenge, but I really need a great escape from reality. I already join two challenges, now. The two challenges are TBR Pile Challenge by Adam and the Beat the Backlist Challenge by  novelknight . I am really excited to finish those challenges ! They are about the TBR piles, and it helps me so much to reducing my TBR books that piled up so high.

I thought two challenges would be enough for me this year. Until I accidentally found 2018 New Release Challenge hosted by Lexie. I think this is a fresh air to my reading list because until now, all of my TBR is a backlist books and I do want to read new releases book some time. Also, seeing the terms and conditions of the challenges, it’s not a pressure challenge that I avoid. We can still read one or two release books of the year and it’s just okay. So, I think I wanted to join this. As I mentioned in my previous posts, I had some issues with my health (mental health) that makes me a little bit hard to concentrate, so the – not- so – pressuring- reading- challenges hopefully will help me.

The rules for the 2018 New Release Challenge are simple:

  • Books have to be released and reviewed in 2018.
  • Other challenges can be used as well, if you are participating in the Netgalley / Edelweiss challenge or in the COYER challenge, books can count towards more than one challenge, as long as the ones you use for the 2018 New Release Reading Challenge qualify to the other rules.
  • The minimum length for a book to qualify is 100 pages, it can be in any format though, physical, e-book, ARC or audiobook.
  • The New Book Release Challenge is open from January 1st through December 31st 2018, and sign-ups are open until September 1st 2018.
  • You don’t have to be a blogger to participate, you can link to your review on Goodreads or Booklikes instead – so don’t be shy!
  • If you want to spread the love, please use #2018NewRelease on Twitter

So here we go, The 2018 New Release Challenge ! Wish me luck, guys.

Review Buku : Gadis Kretek

14 Jan

Gadis KretekGadis Kretek by Ratih Kumala
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

Tidak pernah saya bayangkan saya akan begitu tertarik dengan rokok-rokokan sampai membaca buku ini. Yah, saya memang dididik bahwa rokok menjadi penyebab berbagai penyakit.

Gaya penulisannya sangat lugas dan menjadikan buku ini mudah sekali diselesaikan dalam sekali baca. Cerita di dalamnya sebenarnya miris dan berupa tragedi namun dibalut dengan berbagai kekonyolan-kekonyolan dari karakternya. Sebut saja Lebas dan kakaknya yang sering sekali berantem dengan lucu. Saya tertawa-tawa membaca cerita ini.

Alur pada buku adalah alur mundur diman sebagian besar di buku ini menceritakan sejarah pabrik rokok kretek dua keluarga. Sangat menarik, saya jadi mengenali berbagai macam rokok dan bahan-bahan yang digunakan. Bahkan cara menggambarkannya sangat indah. Sehingga mau tidak mau pembaca seperti saya yang anti rokok ini menjadi simpati dan mengerti bagaimana orang-orang yang hidupnya bergantung pada rokok. Saya juga menyukai aspek sejarah yang dibahas di dalam buku, sejak dari zaman penjajahan Belanda sampai ke zaman PKI.

Buku ini buku yang serius tapi sungguh menarik dengan banyolan-banyolannya yang lucu. Jelas, buku ini membuat saya tertarik untuk membaca cerita lainnya dari Ratih Kumala Sari.

View all my reviews

Review Buku : Lelaki Tua dan Laut

4 Jan

Lelaki Tua dan LautLelaki Tua dan Laut by Ernest Hemingway
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

Santiago, seorang lelaki tua pelaut yang sehari – hari bekerja untuk mencari ikan, sudah lama sekali tidak mendapatkan tangkapan. Tepatnya sudah 84 hari, Santiago berlayar sendirian tanpa hasil. Teman Santiago, yang sudah seperti anaknya sendiri, Manolin, bahkan harus pindah berlayar bersama orang lain karena orang tua Manolin menganggap Santiago bernasib buruk. Santiago pun dengan sabar berlayar sendirian dan tidak pernah marah kepada Manolin atau orang tuanya. Bahkan, mereka berdua masih bersahabat. Akhirnya pada hari ke-85, Santiago pun bertekad untuk mendapatkan ikan dengan berlayar sendirian.

Buku ini novella hanya memiliki 100an halaman, dan bisa dibaca dalam waktu singkat. Yang saya baca ini versi terjemahan oleh Pak Sapardi Djoko Damono. Walaupun diterjemahkan oleh Bapak Sapardi, saya agak kesulitan dalam mencerna bahasanya. Mungkin akan lebih mudah bila saya membaca versi bahasa Inggrisnya. Mungkin saja begitu, karena buku ini adalah klasik modern sehingga bahasa Shakespeare sepertinya akan jarang ada di dalam buku ini.

Perasaan saya campur aduk setelah selesai membaca buku ini. Buku ini, sesuai dengan judulnya, menceritakan tentang seorang lelaki tua dan laut yang sangat luas dan berbagai makhluk hidup yang ada. Persis seperti membaca Life of Pi, saya bisa merasakan ombak, angin laut, dan ikan – ikan yang berseliweran di sekitar saya hanya dengan membaca. Hal itu yang membuat Hemingway benar – benar bisa membangun suasana hanya dengan tulisannya. Apa namanya kalau bukan hebat ?

Karakter favorit saya selain Pak Tua (yang menunjukkan keberanian dan membuat saya terkagum – kagum dengan keteguhan hatinya) adalah Manolin. Ya, Manolin, yang hanya muncul di awal dan akhir buku. Kenapa Manolin ? Manolin adalah gambaran seorang anak yang ingin sekali saya ikuti. Luar biasa bagaimana dia sayang kepada Santiago dan mencoba membantu walaupun Pak Tua yang berani ini berkali – kali menolaknya. Saya terharu dengan persahabatan Manolin dan Santiago, dan berharap mereka akan terus bersahabat seakan – akan mereka berdua adalah manusia nyata. Membaca dan meresapi bagaimana Pak Tua yang tidak gentar dalam memperjuangkan harga dirinya adalah suatu pengalaman yang tidak bisa dilupakan, menurut saya. Oh ya, selain itu melalui buku ini kita juga banyak belajar mengenai Ikan dan laut lho.

Hanya saja, jangan berharap suatu cerita dengan plot mencekam dan penuh misteri. Jangan juga berharap petualangan penuh dengan keseruan dan ancaman – ancaman bajak laut. Bila mencari yang seperti itu, kalian sepertinya salah membeli buku. Buku ini murni mengenai bagaimana kisah seorang laki – laki tua yang berjuang demi harga diri dan kecintaannya terhadap pekerjaannya. Saya yakin buku ini membosankan bagi banyak orang. 

View all my reviews

MDD : Membaca Depresi Demensia

31 Des

 

Hasil gambar untuk Chester Bennington

Chester Bennington, Jong Hyun dan tentu saja masih ada nama –nama lainnya. Saya sangat menyayangkan mengapa dari tragedi seperti ini dunia baru tergerak dan menyadari mengenai depresi. Saya sendiri, mungkin bila tidak merasakan apa yang mereka rasakan juga akan acuh. Entah ini salah satu pelajaran atau bukan, saya didiagnosis Gangguan Depresi Mayor oleh psikiater yang juga dosen saya dulu. Tepatnya pada tanggal 10 Oktober di tahun ini, yah saat Hari Kesehatan Mental Sedunia diadakan.

Saya tidak akan membahas bagaimana dan mengeluhkan apa yang saya jalani sampai saat ini. Toh ini adalah blog buku, sehingga saya ingin semuanya masih berbau buku. Yah, depresi bukanlah hanya tentang kesedihan dan meratapi nasib. Tadinya saya berpikir begitu, namun ternyata depresi bahkan bisa mempengaruhi kemampuan membaca saya. Jadi begini, sebulan yang lalu, dokter saya mengatakan saya mengalami pseudodemensia. Pseudodemensia adalah gangguan memori yang terjadi mendadak, biasanya akibat penyakit – penyakit tertentu. Contohnya ya depresi.

Mengapa bisa begitu ? Mungkin karena saya mengeluhkan tidak bisa mengingat nama kucing saya, ATM saya terblokir dan saya tidak bisa membuka email saya serta akun –akun lainnya. Sayangnya, hal ini juga berpengaruh pada satu hal yang saya cintai, yaitu membaca. Untuk mulai bisa menumbuhkan minat dalam membaca saja saya sangat berjuang, seperti yang kita tahu, depresi bisa menghilangkan minat terhadap hal – hal yang disukai. Untunglah, saya bisa membaik setelah pengobatan dan akhirnya bisa berminat lagi membaca. Walaupun ada beberapa buku yang tidak bisa saya lanjutkan karena sangat mempengaruhi mood saya atau menimbulkan rasa panic dan cemas.  Semuanya berjalan hampir normal, namun semenjak saya mengalami serangan lupa lupa ini, saya mengakui membaca menjadi sangaaaaat sulit. Saya tidak bisa membaca paragraph panjang karena saya selalu lupa tentang apa yang dibicarakan. Saya tidak bisa mengingat nama tokoh ini siapa. Parahnya lagi hal ini sangat tidak membantu saya ketika membaca buku – buku klasik berbahasa Inggris, karena terkadang saya tiba – tiba blank tentang apa yang dibicarakan. Halooo, saya yang normal saja masih agak kesulitan kok membaca buku klasik bahasa Inggris (but I love it so much, I do!) apalagi tidak bisa konsentrasi seperti ini.

Akhirnya dosis pun ditingkatkan oleh dokter dan… saya sudah bisa membaca kembali. Walaupun terkadang masih agak terganggu, tapi saya sangat bersyukur saya bisa menikmati kembali hal yang saya cintai sejak dulu. Kejadian ini juga membuat saya lebih rajin membaca buku – buku yang tadinya sangat jarang saya baca, yaitu non fiksi. Sayang sekali buku – buku non fiksi yang saya baca kebanyakan tidak ada di Goodreads, dan belum saya review di blog juga, namun semenjak tiga bulan terakhir di tahun 2017 ini, saya sudah membaca lima buku non fiksi. Ternyata… saya suka! Selain itu saya juga mulai mencoba untuk menulis review kembali hanya sekedar untuk mencari kesibukan dan sebagai pengingat buku apa saja yang saya baca. Alhasil, blog ini menjadi berisi kembali di penghujung tahun. Ya, selalu ada hikmah di setiap kejadian. Semoga saja saya bisa terus membaca dan berbagi cerita tentang pengalaman saya baik dari review maupun dari postingan random saya. Oh ya, semoga kalian semua diberi kesehatan baik fisik maupun jiwa, Aamiin. Selamat Tahun Baru.

Salam hangat. ❤